Recommended Blog

Recommended Blog

By Barb

 

            During the month of March, I read several blogs written by single moms. I wasn’t sure which one I wanted to write a review about until like came across the one titled: Diary of a Mad Woman.

The author of this blog is not mentioned by name. She is a single mom raising three kids on her own after she lost her husband to suicide. The author writes about day-to-day problems she has to deal with as a single mom. Her writing is blatantly honest but her style of writing is sarcastic and humorous all rolled in to one. The author encourages her readers to live and laugh no matter how difficult life fits. Her blog is listed in the top 25 Funny Moms Blogs and in the top 25 blogs of Single Moms listed under Top mommy blogs. Top mommy Blogs is a directory where they rank and rate the Top Mommy Blogs. (Top Mommy Blogs, 2012) The author of this blog started the blog after the death of her husband. She stated it is “cheaper than therapy”. She calls her blog her ‘bullhorn”.

Just a section of her blog dated March 20, 2013 went like this;

I’ve been quietly contemplating my next move from the moon lodge. I decided I should consult Dave on what to do, since perhaps he can see things I can’t. I know I’m not that great at taking directions from most people, so I’m not sure why I’m asking a dead person what I should do. “So here’s the deal,” I say. “I need $1,092,000 so that I don’t have to go back to work.” This is no random number. It’s a carefully calculated figure of what I need until baby darling finishes high school. By then surely I will have figured something else out, right?                                                                                    (Woman, 2013)

This is just an example on how she is dealing with the financial needs and challenges of being a single parent. She has to go to work in order to support her children but she wants to stay home and have more time with them and be there for her kids. Her youngest child is only two years old. The other two are school-age. Many moms face this dilemma every day. The author of the blog writes how she plans on handling this problem and does it with humor.

The writing in this blog is not research-based it is just based on the experience of the author but I recommend this blog first single moms because in one way or another they will probably be able to relate to the author’s experiences. She makes me laugh and sometimes even cry. Single parenting isn’t easy under any circumstances but the author deals with it with straightforward honesty and humor.

 

           

 

Diary of a Mad Woman

           http://seriouslythisreallyhappened.blogspot.com/

 

           

 

References:

Top Mommy Blogs. (2012). Top Mommy Blogs. Retrieved from Top Mommy Blogs: http://www.topmommyblogs.com/pages/index.php

Woman, D. o. (2013, March 20). Phase ll. Retrieved from Diary of aMad Woman: http://seriouslythisreallyhappened.blogspot.com/

 

Community Post (Family Matters)

Is there such a thing as the perfect family? The idea of a perfect family continues to fascinate people everyday, even though they know there is no such thing they still want to believe. “Since the 1980s the American family has continued its inexorable evolution towards greater diversity and complexity” (Stanley, 2012). In other words, the American family has come upon many changes and experience that are new to them and have had to readjust in many ways. Because of this, people can find and point out many different types of families around the world. Families are an important start to every single person in this world and that their family will help support them through the rest of their life.  Families are made by many different relationships and consist of many different people in each family. Whether someone comes from a married family, single-parent family, divorced family, cohabitating family or one of the many other types of families everyone has some sort of family. I believe that a family member does not have to be related to the person or even married to each other to consider them family.

A family consists of people around you, those who love you and support you throughout your life.  You connect with these people and have strong bonds between each other, which strengthens your relationship. In a study I came across, the researchers found that children who supported their mothers were more likely to have received support back (Suitor & Sechrist, 2006). A parent is most commonly a child’s first relationship and it continues to grow throughout their life. Support within the family is not a one sided relationship, those who receive support are more likely to return the favor as show within the study I found by Mr. Stanley. The Center for the study of Social Policy states, "Strong Family Relationships is defined as the relational well-being of families” (Center for the Study of Social, 2012.). This study discusses how important support and family is in someone’s life. No matter who is involved, it can even consist of just one individual you family will strengthen and support you. 

“Family life is important given the dramatic changes and pressures associated with contemporary American family life” (Social, 2012). Your family can help with the stresses of live and teach you how to face the world as it comes at you. Family can be whoever leads you to becoming who you are and they help you continue to grow. The relationships you build with them will continue on for most of your live. The perfect family may be what people try to strive for throughout their lives but there can be more to this myth then just trying to prove it wrong or trying to make it a reality.  Remember strengthening your family will be very beneficially to both you and you children.

  

References

Center for the Study of Social, P. (2012). Encouraging Strong Family Relationships. State Policies That Work. Brief Number 6. Center For The Study Of Social Policy,

Social, C. f. (2012). Encouraging Strong Family Relationships. State Policies That Work , Brief Number 6.

Stanley, T. (2012). The Changing Face of the American Family. History Today , 10-15.

Suitor & Sechrist (2006). Within-family differences in mothers’ support to adult children. Psychological Sciences and Social Sciences.

Reader's Question: Single Parent Dating Tips

By: Oliver

I was talking to a few friends about this blog and I was asked a very interesting question, “How do I go back to dating as a single parent when I have children?” I felt that this is something many single parents and even non-single parents wonder themselves. Come to think about, many people have the same question, since dating affects everyone’s life in one way or another. If you are reading this and want to know more about dating and you’re not a single parent, I suggest visiting IntimiDating, which is a wonderful blog that is linked in our tab “Blogs We Like.” However, if you are a single parent and would like to know the answer dating with kids, then you are in right spot! Just sit back, relax, and read on.

I came across a website, More4Kids, which has a focus on parenting children, both on single and non-single parenting tips and hints towards many things, such as dating. I will be using the eight tips of how to date as a single parent with kids. Even though I am covering these eight tips, does not mean these are the only tips in the world! I encourage you to do additional research if you want more tips that what I will cover (e.g. how to focus more on the kids, when it’s appropriate to start dating, etc.). The tips on dating as a single parent are found everywhere, which is why I felt this list does a great job covering the main points of dating as a single parent.

Tip #1 – Never Lie About Being a Parent

When you are dating, you want to make sure that your date understands that you are first a parent. If you try to lie about being a single parent, eventually the truth is going to come out. If they aren't comfortable with this fact, then move on to someone else who can deal with the fact that your priorities are your children.

Tip #2 – Talk to Your Children

Talk to your kids and let them know you're going out to enjoy some adult time with a good friend. At this point, this is all your kids need to know. Keep it simple. Talk to them, but don't get into too many details at this stage in the game.

Tip #3 – Don't Introduce Dates Right Away – Take it Slow

Make sure you have spent a great deal of time with this person in your life before you introduce them to your kids. When you introduce them, it should only be for short periods of time. As things go on, you can include that special person in your family life more and more. However, you don't want them to get attached to your date only for you to break up within a few months.

Tip #4 – Don't Feel Guilty

Many single parents feel guilt when they begin dating again. Eliminate that guilt. It's totally normal to crave some time with other adults. Going out on dates doesn't mean that you are being a bad parent or that you love your children any less. Going on a date is fine as long as it doesn't get in the way of you caring for your children.

Tip #5 – Avoid Talking About Your Ex

When you are dating as a single parent, one important tip to remember is to avoid talking about your ex. Make sure you are over your ex before you begin dating again. As things get more serious, avoid making your date feel uncomfortable by complaining about your ex for the entire date.

Tip #6 – Be a Role Model in Your Relationship

As you are dating, make sure that you are a role model in your relationship. Do you want your kids bringing home new dates to stay overnight? If not, you need to avoid doing this yourself. You need to set a good role model for the children in your home, especially when it comes to the new relationship you are involved in.

Tip #7 – Keep Safety in Mind

The most important things to keep in mind is your safety and the safety of your children. Get to know people before bringing them into your home. You never want to bring home anyone that may be a safety risk to your children. This is why it is so important that you keep safety in mind and avoid bringing any date home right away to meet the kids.

Tip #8 – Listen to Your Children

Last, it is so important that you listen to your children. When you just get out into the dating game again, it is easy to look at a new date blindly. Once your date meets your kids, listen to what your children have to say about your date. Often kids can offer some great input and unique perspectives. If your child truly feels uncomfortable or scared with your date, this is a good reason to break things off.

(Parents, 2013)

Reference:

Parents. (2013, January 1). Single Parent Dating Tips. Retrieved March 29, 2013, from More4Kids: http://www.more4kids.info/3449/single-parent-dating-tips/